Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Why Spongebob plays a big role on my drinking

"Spongebob Squarepants" celebrates thirteen years being on the air, and that little bastard still owes me a Pina Colada I don't care if part of the ingredients are his house.

Spongebob is 95% part of the reason why I drink in the first place. I mean do you think someone over the age of 15 can watch a show about a sponge making hamburgers who's best friends with a squirrel and a starfish under water? 

I'm shocked I don't watch this show stoned.
Okay I have a few times. My point is this.

Spongebob is a sponge.

I will repeat this.

Spongebob Squarepants is a sponge, and he has been on television for 13 years.

Anyway, here's a fun way to start off your nights out. It's what I'd like to call "Saturday Morning Breakfast"

  • Drink whenever Patrick looks confused
  • Drink when Mr. Krabs says "you wastin all me money"
  • Drink whenever Sandy talks. No body likes to hear that bitch talk. Not no body
  • Drink twice whenever Gary meows. When's the last time you heard a snail meow? Drink four.
  • Drink whenever Spongebob dances
  • Drink whenever Spongebob frollics
  • Jelly fishing. Drink for just reading that.
  • Drink whenever Spongebob is being Spongebob
  • Chug.
This drinking game will guarantee you a great time in the emergency room.
In all seriousness I really love this show.

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